What do you do when someone’s achieved your dream? Does a Kelly haze descend? It encompasses wanting what another has, not wanting them to have it or thinking that because they have it, you won’t get it or it will be taken away from you. Is it any wonder that jealousy is compared to murder in the Bible? Complex and negative, it’s a step too far along a ruinous road. Then there is its olive toned cousin, envy, which still covets what another has but can have a redeeming quality: inspiration.
I don’t like to admit to these most human of emotions but I confess yesterday I was envious. I’d just finished reading ‘From Pasta to Pigfoot’. I’d like to have a written and published a book too! Not fair! Or is it? Frances had talked about writing a novel when I worked for her briefly 9 years ago. I don’t know her very well; she’s my sister-in-law’s friend. However, she perseveres as can be attested by anyone who has witnessed the growth of her presence offline and elsewhere.
So instead of marinating in my envy, I chose to be inspired. This morning when there are a million things to do before we leave for the UK later, I decided to revisit my almost 15k word manuscript : critically rereading the appraisal sent by my tutor from the Faber online writing course I completed in May, noting the feedback from my course mates and making notes on how to rework and take forward my story. I plan to use the ‘bodyclock con’ to my advantage and do some writing while on holiday.
How can you make envy work for you?